Fleuranthropy: "The act of giving something to others is an art of flowering your heart." Vinayak

23 December 2022. The holiday season is meant to be a time of joy and yet for many, it also can be a challenging one. Living alone, missing loved ones who are no longer with us, struggling with health issues or coping with issues beyond our control like war and inflation create heightened stress during this putative festive time.

Recently, a member of Adas Israel's Hesed Committee reached out to Mrs. Dalloway asking if she could send flowers to some senior members of their community to lift their spirits. For the Hanukah holiday, Mrs. Dalloway did just that with her fleuranthropy. She wasn't quite sure what to expect, not knowing the circumstances upon which she would find these chosen recipients. She created luxe, bespoke, sparkly, festive bouquets with peonies, roses, tulips and ice blue metallic ilex using the the colours of Israel, blue and white. Reluctantly, she delivered them in the evening, for that is when her schedule permitted. She was worried that the ladies would not received her flowers until the next day. Her experience with seniors heretofore was that their favourite time to dine was 5pm, or maybe even earlier, and that they would tend to turn in early for the night. To her surprise and delight, Mrs. Dalloway was wrong.

The first delivery was to Shirley, who lived in a senior group home. Shirley, so Mrs. Dalloway was told by the receptionist at the front desk, was having dinner in the dining room. Mrs. Dalloway was invited to bring the flowers into the dining room and give them to her personally. The dining room was filled with many small tables fitted with white linen and abuzz with lively conversation even amongst the wheelchairs and walkers parked nearby and the numerous aides floating about the room. At this stage of life, Mrs. Dalloway noticed that women no longer worried about coiffed hair and makeup. Being among friends is what mattered most. When Mrs. Dalloway walked toward Shirley's table, she saw Shirley sitting together with three others and happily engaged in conversation. Smiling, Mrs. Dalloway approached her and wished her a Happy Hanukah and gave her the flowers. She then told Shirley that the flowers are from Mrs. Dalloway-- to which she had a blank look on her face-- and also from the Hesed committee, after which a big smile emerged on Shirley's face. "I know Joe, the committee chair," she said. Mrs. Dalloway, Shirley and her friends talked a bit longer and Shirley's aide took the flowers up to Shirley's apartment for her. Mrs. Dalloway thought to herself that she got just as much out of giving the flowers as Shirley did receiving them. She also noticed the importance of connectedness and how it mattered more when Shirley heard that the flowers were sent from the Hesed Committee, her lifelong friends with whom she was unable to meet for so long due to COVID and the constraints of not being completely independent and mobile.

The next delivery was for Judy who lived in a nearby building, again for senior living. When Mrs. Dalloway entered it, she did not see a receptionist manning the front desk. She was enchanted, however, hearing Hanukah music emanating throughout the halls as she began to walk down the winding corridor. In her hands, she carried the luxe bouquet meant for Judy. Suddenly, Mrs. Dalloway saw a nurse who greeted her and asked if she needed anything. Mrs. Dalloway told her that she had flowers for Judy and wanted to deliver them to her. The nurse said that Judy was participating in a program and that she could not be interrupted. Mrs. Dalloway understood and gave the flowers to her so she could put them in Judy's apartment for her to find when she returned later. Then, Mrs. Dalloway asked the nurse if she could pop her head into the room where the program was taking place and watch for a bit. The nurse graciously allowed her to do so. Inside the room there were rows of chairs set up, classroom style, and seated in those chairs were white and grey haired seniors listening, watching and singing along with the musicians playing lively Hanukah music with a guitar, piano and violin. Judy was seated in the front row, in the chair at the far right end of the row, alone, not next to anyone else. Despite this, she was still in community, enjoying music and celebrating the holiday. Tears began to fill in Mrs. Dalloway's eyes partly because of the wonderful care these seniors received and the special programs offered to them, partly because she wondered how these senior really felt inside, and partly because she reflected on her own life and how quickly it goes by and all of the feelings from the loss of time with friends due to COVID, and in a blink, she herself would be white haired and living who knows where. Mrs. Dalloway lingered at the door of that room, and when she eventually left she thought of something her father once told her, " Life is a gift. Make each day a celebration."